Loss

Our family experienced a huge loss that I never blogged about.  It happened during the peroid of time that was was taking a blog hiatus....a crazy busy time.  We lost Kris' dad in a horrible car wreck May 27, 2013. My kids lost their Pop pop who thought they hung the moon.  The thought of this loss still takes my breath away and leaves my in shock.  Leaves me wanting to scream to God, "why??".  I hate it.  I hate it so much.  The weekend it happened was the perfect weekend.  Kris, the kids and I went up to the lake to see kris' parents because they were in town for Labor Day.  We had an awesome weekend with them.  It rained all weekend- which seemed like a nuisance, but was a blessing as it kept us all in the house together.  Kris' dad wasn't able to do all the projects he normally kept busy with, but was able to relax.  I remember seeing his sitting out on the porch, drinking his coffee, reading his bible.  The kids would come out there and visit.  All weekend I remember his calling Abby "Miss Priss" and complimenting her pretty pink dress.  I remember the way she giggled at him and loved him to tickle her. It was a weekend of no fighting and quality time .  I remember getting ready to leave and telling pop pop that I liked his blue shirt and him telling her he got it at Academy.  I remember his help buckle the kids in the car like he always did and I remember Carter being sad we had to go.  As kris pulled out, I remember pop pop tickling Carter through the car window and I can still remember waving to him as we drove away.  All the other details....I don't want to remember.  The horrible call from Kris' mom as we were diving home from a fun swim....and the horrible days and weeks that followed.  I do want Carter and Abby to know how much Pop pop adored then.  I want Ellie to know what Pop Pop already knew she was going to be a girl- he told me so that weekedb. There are so many things I want them to know.  People say that time heals all wounds- I wouldn't say it heals them, because I still feel just the same when I think of the terrible loss.  I have this time hop app on my phone and this was the one today....

I remember that pop pop took Carter to the mall that day and he picked out that hat.  He also took him to get a watch fixed of pop pop that he gave him.  Such sweet memories.  I know this rambles and doesn't make the most sense, but I wanted to wrote down my memories....for my kids to see.